Monday, July 28, 2008

Another OB visit -

This was our third - we saw Tricia, the NP again... it was quick and easy - she measured M's uterus (which I think came in at 22cm) and checked the Doodle-bops heartbeat with the Doppler (144-146 bpm); so far, so good!! I should just be thankful for an uneventful pregnancy, right?? She did tell us that next visit is the Glucon (?? not sure if that's right) test - you know, where you drink the super-sweet, nasty, sugary crap and then have blood drawn an hour later... anyway, of course I'll be there - we're seeing a different doctor that day also. Gotta meet 'em all, I guess; if we're lucky, M will go into labor on Sunday the 16th and who knows who will deliver the Doodle-bops!! Anyway, I figured that I should come and keep her company - I know that she still has that persistent, low grade nausea and the Glucon solution isn't going to help that any! Blech!! Makes me glad that I'm not the pregnant one!! LOL

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Just when I finally convinced B

that he can't whoop M's ex's ass just because the man "deserves a good ass whooping," my dumbass, self-righteous ex-BIL does something to piss B off... I got this email from my sister earlier this week - (I've edited out the contact information, though I don't know why... I should have left the asshole's email addy and phone number on here - LOL

Thought you might get a chuckle out of this.....apparently you have joined me in being the root of all evil. You'd think by now I'd be over being surprised at what a horses ass my ex can be, but the fun just keeps coming. Of course then I had to Email Dr. N***** (she's doing our custody reevaluation) and apprise her of the actual situation. It's just amazing the crap he can concoct.....frighteningly enough I'm sure he actually believes this. I think my divorce once again tops your's for nastiness (LOL).

Talk to you soon,


----- Forwarded Message -----
From: B H
To: Linda N
Cc: mh
Sent: Mon, 21 Jul 2008 18:33:45 -0400 (EDT)
Subject: Re: appointment

Dr. N*****,

I also feel that I need to add a situation today to the notes to be discussed.
Today when I picked up the children and they came home we went swimming.
L made a comment about her mother being pregnant and then T was very upset with her saying out loud that mom told us not to say anything and keep it a secret. Turns out that the baby is apparently a surrogate for her sister (who has 3 children from the first 2 of her 4 marriages). She also doesnt have custody because a court decided that custody should go to the father. Her older sister wanted another baby with the 4th husband but couldnt so M said she would carry it. I am very concerned that the children would be asked and have the added pressure to keep secrets (especially from their father) and that is completely inappropriate. Thanks

Blair H

My reply was basically - "Well, I guess I'm just a skank ho' who's had 19 children by 16 different men... and I didn't even friggin' realize that I don't have custody of my boys - obviously B knows better and M and I have been doing it wrong all these years. I guess I'd better go tell them they have to go back to their father's house now, since they're not allowed to be here."

I don't know what planet B is living on or in what universe he operates, but he's just not here (in the land of the sane and reasonable) with the rest of us!I had to ask M what this was all about and apparently they are currently going through a custody re-evaluation, which was built into the original agreement (review and adjustments as needed at the 1 yr anniversary) - pretty smart since I know first hand how difficult (if not impossible) it is to change custody orders once they are finalized...

Now, if B truly thought that my sister was encouraging her children to lie to him, I can see that being a concern... but he could have mentioned that to the counselor without divulging any personal details about ME. My life, my history, the number of times I've been married, MY custody situation - even if I HAD been declared an unfit mother - really have NO bearing whatsoever on THEIR custody agreement/arrangement!! It's not like my sister and I are living together or watching each other's children, even occasionally!! Of course, his intent wasn't simply to pass on information that concerned him; his true intent was to present M as a woman who would agree to carry and bear a child for a sister who is obviously unfit, since she has had several children by multiple men, all of which she has lost through the court system. M said that she sent the counselor an email expressing her opinion that the information B provided had absolutely nothing to do with the issue at hand and that, just "for the record," I do have joint custody of my sons and always have.

The other pertinent fact being that she didn't ask the children to lie to B in the first damn place!! When she told them about the baby, L (bless her sweet little heart) jumped up and asked if she could call her daddy to tell him; M told her that, no, she could not - that B would find out about it, and while it was not a secret, right now it really wasn't any of his concern so L didn't need to make an immediate phone call. M says that L's the "informer" - I know how that is!! I have one, too!

Anyway, I read the email outloud to B who asked me to read it a second time, then let out a long breath and mumbled, "He shoulda just left me, left us, out of it..." Now we're all thinking it would be a BAD idea for my B to ever meet M's B. Let's just say that, if the two DO ever meet, B is planning on handling it "South Philly style" and there's not going to be a damn thing I can do about it!The BEST part is, the Asshole forwarded his email to M and then when he saw her in person, he congratulated us and told her that it was a wonderful, selfless thing that she's doing. WTF?!? Talk about bipolar - maybe his manic self doesn't know what his depressive self does...

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Whoever said chinchillas aren't "prolific breeders"??

Twinkle had baby number 3 early this afternoon. I had had First Born checking them daily while B and I were gone - just to make sure that, if it were to be born, the baby was in the bottom half of the cage where the hardware cloth would keep it from escaping... he told me this afternoon that there was no baby, but then he also said that he couldn't see inside the little Igloo thingy and God forbid that he reach INTO the cage to check...

So anyway, when I got home this evening, I went to see for myself and I moved the Igloo - what I found looked like a dried up piece of placenta, and I kinda freaked out until I saw the little legs and tail poking out from under Twinkle. This new baby appears (so far) to be a girl and she's the same silver grey color as Slippers. Her umbilical cord was still wet looking and she was moving very slowly, so I think she was only a few hours old when I 'discovered' her! I checked her again later this evening and her gait has definitely picked up!! She'll be jumping in just a few days time! Thank goodness I got that hardware cloth installed last week! Little Man will be SO thrilled to hear that his baby chin has arrived!!

Speaking of Little Man, I got the cutest note from him at camp... he's having fun except for the spiders and snakes, and the food's not too good, so he asked for a care package that included Goldfish crackers and chocolate! LOL I'm going to go out tomorrow and buy him stuff and ship it Priority so he'll have it by Wednesday; of course, I'll send Middle Child something too... I didn't have an address for them, so I didn't know if we could write or send stuff. Apparently their dad gave them stamped and addressed envelopes so they could write US if they chose to do so! Or maybe, like when I was at camp, the counselor's make the kids write home!! Whatever the case, I'm SO glad he did!! It's the cutest note! Oh, I'm glad to be back home. I didn't sleep well at ALL in that hotel!! B is still up in Philly/DC and will be coming home some time tomorrow. I hope he is able to leave in the morning 'cause I'd really like to see him before I have to go to work!!

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

We're half-way there!!

Amazing... I can't believe that we are HALF WAY THERE!! It seems unreal - I remember, so very clearly, sitting on that concrete wall outside the "Medico" in El Salvador, on that crazy cell phone, talking to my sister and asking her a million questions about the transfer... I remember lying on my back with my legs dangling over the edge of the wall and staring up at the stars, swatting away mosquitoes that I hoped weren't carrying malaria!! I didn't think we'd ever get here, but now it seems that it all happened in just the blink of an eye!

Our 2nd ultrasound was today - done by Dr. D, the peri who did the nuchal scan. B opted to stay home today - he said he'd just "watch the movie." The very idea that he might see any portion of my sister's body just makes him so uncomfortable he can barely sit still. I don't think he'll be able to stay in the room for the delivery! If he gives it a shot, he'll end up sneaking out before the good part - part of it is his age, I'm sure. He says it's because he has to see my sister again, and if he accidentally caught a shot of her hoo-ha... well, that's the image that would pop into his mind every time he looked at her, and he's not willing to risk that! LOL That's ok... I'll catch our baby girl and he can meet her after we get her cleaned up!

Anyway, back to the u/s - The Doodle-bops was very active today and looked just great per Dr. D. We got some lovely shots of her face - though it looked a little freaky as she moved in and out of the plane of the u/s - at times it looked like her eyeballs were popping out of her skull!! Everything is developing perfectly, though - her femur, humerus, head circumference all measure 19w and 2-6d (we're 19w6d today) - her abdominal circumference came in at a whopping 20w2d!! So she's a chubby little girl already! LOL Oh, and the bleed is entirely gone!! Woo hoo!! What GREAT news!

And her profile, mouth open -

M is hoping that she will be closer to the size of HER children at birth than to MINE, since mine were at least a pound larger and that's a big percentage when you're only talking about 7-8#.

Baby Girl's crib bedding arrived this morning and I took the throw pillow to mom (she came for the u/s) so that she would have a sample of each of the 3 fabrics in it. We're going to put the rocker that my grandmother got when I was born into the Doodle-bops' room; mom is going to make coordinated pads for the seat and back for me, and now she has some fabric to go off of. The bedding is nice - not as luxurious or "rich" as it looked online (imagine that...), and it will all desperately need to be ironed before we can use it, but it will do - I think it will make a pretty nursery once it's assembled. Mom is on the hunt for picture frames to use for the 4 generation pics like she did for my niece - a pic of my grandmother at about age 4, my mother at about age 2, we'll find an appropriate pic of me as a toddler and then the 4th will be for the Doodle-bops and we'll update the pic periodically until she is 2-3 yrs old and then leave it at that

Mom is already planning out her first "formal portrait" in January!! She wants to go back to M who did the family portraits last March - she has my christening gown or, if that's too large, a pretty gauzy handmade dress that came from Barbados. She said we need to repeat the pic of "all the girls" because "we did that last year, but you didn't have your little girl, so we'll have to do it again." She is really getting into the idea of this baby, which is wonderful, and she is thrilled that it's a girl - as we all are!

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

The nightmare of the estate is finally over!!

OMG - I can hardly believe it (and I won't completely believe it until I see it in writing) but it appears that the nightmare of J's estate is finally behind me!! B came to court with me today - I was absolutey a bundle of nerves and sick to my stomach - which seems kinda stupid in hindsight - I mean, what where they going to do to me?? Reprimand me, maybe; make me pay some of the estate's debts, possibly... but "they can't eat me" so why be so worried?? All the rationalization in the world wasn't working - I wanted to puke...

Of course, A-hole (aka the biggest asshole, loser attorney that I've ever had the displeasure of having to work with) was LATE... so B and I sat in the clerk's office and waited, and waited, until he finally strolled in 20 mins after our appointed time. He DID apologize for keeping us waiting, as if I care - I didn't bother to speak to him.

Ms. G (the county clerk) took us to her conference room where we all sat around a moderately sized table... she let A-hole speak first - he started off by saying that he had been unable to file the final accounting because he was unable to get the required information from me (WTF?!?) and futher stated that he had drawn up a document to withdraw as the attorney of record because I had told him that he had already been paid enough money and I wasn't going to pay him any more, and he wasn't willing to work for someone with that attitude.

Now, I'm fuming and B is squeezing my wrist to try to get me to keep my mouth shut - Ms. G turned to me and asked if I had a response. Well, hell yeah I have a response!! I could feel that annoying lump in my throat and the burning in my eyes that I get when I'm really pissed, but I did manage to keep the tears in check (not very effective if you start crying when you're MAD) - I told her that if A-hole was lacking any information from me it was because he had not returned a single phone call or responded to a single piece of correspondence in the preceeding 14 months; I told her that I had made over 80 phone calls and that I still had not spoken to him since the day we filed LAST year's inventory. I further told her that he had contacted an auctioneer to take possession of all of the estate's remaining assets, with instructions to sell them and return the monies to HIM, and that I had no idea what had become of those assets or any monies from their sale, that his office refused to provide me with either that information or the name of the auctioneer so that I could contact him myself (as I was explaining this part, he pulled a check out of his pile of paperwork); I also told her that A-hole was correct in saying that I had not paid him any more money, but that I had never made any comment about him having already been paid enough since we hadn't spoken in over a year, and that I HAD told him in a letter that I was NOT going to pay him a dime UNTIL he explained to me why he received (in Dec 2005) the claim against the estate that J's mother filed, yet failed to give it to me until May of 2007 - and since he wouldn't speak to me, and hadn't explained it to me, I had no intention of paying him...

At this point, Ms. G made no comment, but picked up the check from the auctioneer and considered it for a moment; she then made a comment to A-hole that he had held the check for so long that the bank wasn't going to honor it, so he needed to get a replacement check and send it to me immediately. She asked how much money was in the estate accounts and then said that I was to deposit the new check from the auctioneer when it arrived and then send the entire amount to A-hole and that was going to be his compensation for his "administrative" duties for the estate... he immediatey agreed. (B later pointed out to me that Ms. G and A-hole had apparently already decided the outcome of our little meeting, which seemed to be held just for show - to give me a chance to speak my piece) - as to the outstanding claim against the estate from J's mother - Ms. G said that she will be issuing a letter stating that the estate is out of money and no further debts will be paid.

While it grates my ass that A-hole is getting ANY money from the estate, my big fear was that there was going to be financial repercussions on my personal situation - like being ordered to pay A-hole's $3500 bill. He's getting about $1340, which is far more than he deserves, but once he is paid and the paperwork is filed, this is OVER!! What freedom that will be!!